Saul

Holy shit new episodes of Better Call Saul.

People are helpful because they want to demonstrate that they're of use to the tribe. I find that pathetic. A little. On one hand. I also find that logical. And sad. And sort of sweet in an innocent way.

I wonder how much of what we do is to prove that we are of use to the tribe, in one way or the other. 

I almost got fired. My coworker told me so. Because my boss told her. She stood up for me. Go coworker. She is the best thing about working there. Has been from the start. 

My boss is horrible at times. I had some respect for him until I overheard him use the N word. And he's a Chinese immigrant. My boss's best friend, who also works for my boss, said "He has no use for black people." To my face. I told him I'd slap him if I ever heard him say anything like that again. And I fucking will. And this guy is also my coworker's brother. And I know my coworker, as much as I love her, doesn't think it's right for gay people to have kids. She said, "Why would they do that to the child?" My other coworker has expressed his displeasure with immigrants, and he is an immigrant himself, from Italy, but he's not okay with illegal immigrants. Even though it took his father 8 years to get his family here.  And another guy that does work for my boss said that he was sure that is was a Mexican who messed up on one of the jobs. And the mechanic who comes in to work on the machines has a sign on his car and his van and his hat and his t-shirt that says Friend of Jesus. I liked him and his son until we had our first real discussion where I found out that the father believes that homosexuality is evil and the son thinks that it's wrong because it's only about sex. And the misogyny is thick among this crowd too.  In other words, I'm surrounded by people whose views I find deplorable. Their casual bigotry is revolting. So. Yeah. My respect for this lot is pretty fucking low. And it's starting to show. And, I don't think that it will be different anywhere else I work around here.

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